It was a crazy Thursday!

Our closest Walmart is about 75 miles away. And as a family of six, we’re there once a week because things like apples and bananas just don’t keep. The plan was to drive up, do our shopping, and then the kids and I would drive home. Ben would stay to go to work.

Except just as we were gassing up, he called me:

He’d forgotten a critical piece of equipment and had to go home to get it.

Oh no!

I offered to make the round trip drive a second time because as tired as I knew it would make me, it would give HIM a chance to nap before the potential of flying a helicopter all night. (Night shifts, man! I could NOT do it, I can’t sleep during the day unless I’m sick.)

So kids and I gassed up and headed home.

Except when we got close to the Ranch… 75% of the kids had to poop! I let the dog out to pee (he peed on the porch), changed two diapers and got the two bigs to go to the bathroom, then changed another poopy diaper, grabbed a cheese stick and a cup of coffee for the road and MOTORED.

We were about 20 miles from Ben when…

The van started to fill with stink. So much stink.

I assumed it was New Baby. I assumed it was a blowout.

By the time I got to Ben’s hotel, everyone was feeling a little green from the stink. And he was asleep. (Good he rested but I had a Code Brown!)

I finally had the front desk ring his room. I’m sure she thought something nefarious was going on – nope but poo-splosions. We passed in the lobby – he went to the van with the rest of the kids. I got to his room only to discover:

Wrong kid!

While New Baby DID have a poop, it was a tiny poo. About this time Ben calls me from where he was with the other kids in the van. In between his gagging I learned that it was Baby Cheeseball who needed the hazmat.

And BOY was it hazardous.

She got a full shower in the hotel.
Change of clothes.
Car seat got wiped down and a towel borrowed from the hotel so she wasn’t still sitting in you-know-what.

Unfortunately, that brown adventure added an extra HOUR to our day. So I was driving home in the dark. Which I NEVER do because my driving night vision is just… well, it’s terrible. Plus cows.

Friday I spent in bed with a killer tension headache. But the equipment was delivered to Dad Dad and an adventure was had by all.

Note to self:

Don’t give kids ring pops in the car. They cause explosive poops. Better to do that at HOME.

Kim Galloway
Find me!
Latest posts by Kim Galloway (see all)