You have a message to share with the world. And you’re taking steps to get it out—writing your book, launching a bestseller campaign, creating a business, building an email list, being active on social media.
You’re harboring a deep-seated fear of having all those efforts actually pay off. You want to make a difference in the world but… do you really have to be a celebrity to do that?
Friend, I’m with you.
For every time when I’m like:
I’m so SICK of being invisible! I’m awesome. My work is awesome! My message matters. I TOTALLY should be serving more clients, having more interviews, and being Out There more! I’m going to be more visible! Post more. More videos. More! More! More!
There’s an equal day that says:
Oh look… my comfy sweatshirt. I don’t want to get out there today—it’s too hard, takes too much time, doesn’t yield results, and I *might* have to comb my hair and put on makeup. I think I’ll hide behind my computer instead.
Being visible is scary. It means that you’re out there in a place where you CAN be judged. (It doesn’t mean you WILL be judged. It just means you COULD be judged!)
So what do you do?
1. Remember your message.
Every time I want to stay in quiet anonymity, I remember MY message:
To help my authors share their messages so that they can be a positive impact on the world.
How can I do that if I’m hiding? So I think about you, my friend, and that if I’m invisible to you, you’re invisible to who needs YOU the most.
2. You’re not as big of a deal as you think.
We’re a big deal to ourselves and we’re a big deal to those closest to us. We want to make a Big Impact on the people we’re meant to serve.
But how many people IS that really?
100? 1,000? 50,000? 250,000?
There are BILLIONS of people on the planet. And the biggest influencers I personally know (not the “celebrities” I’m guessing about) have an honest-to-God reach of well under a million people. Yes, even in these days of Tiktok and Instagram; even with millions of “followers” they can’t REACH them all.
Be a HUGE deal to the people to whom you can impact… and forget the rest.
3. Do the thing that scares you.
I’m not talking about jumping out of planes or getting cozy with spiders! Do the visibility thing that scares you.
If that’s writing your book, then buy one of my courses and get into action. If that’s being interviewed, then get booked on a podcast. If it’s emailing your list, queue up a holiday message. If it’s video, swipe on that mascara.
Me? It’s hands-DOWN video. I don’t have a good reason why it bothers me so much; I LOVE speaking in person so it’s not stage fright.
I’ve worked on this one a lot, and then… if I don’t KEEP exercising that muscle, I go right back to being uncomfortable about doing live videos. It rears its head (again): being fearful of being seen, noticed, judged, commented on.
So what’s a writer to do?
I remembered my tip #2—I’m not nearly as big of a deal in the world as I THINK I am. Whew.
I remembered that I have been seen, and judged, on video. 96,900+ views as a matter of fact. Trolls and thumbs down all over the place. (I turned off comments YEARS ago.) It impacts my day-to-day life exactly ZERO, btw.
And here’s the thing:
And (and this is key) I’m letting an old fear keep me from being seen and getting my message to the people who ACTUALLY need me.
4. Remember WHY you want to be seen.
Frankly, this is the most important:
WHY does it matter that you’re getting out there? WHY does it matter that you’re sharing your message?
Doing interviews and Facebook lives and videos (and posts and social media and WHATEVER) is the vehicle – the but heart of the matter is your message. Your message ties it all together, and makes DOING those activities worthwhile.
It’s not about the book or the video or the podcast. It’s about the person who is receiving that information; the person you want to help. The one for whom your message is meant for.
5. What’s getting in your way (and getting in the way of your message)?
For me, back when I was The Outdoor Princess, my brand got in the way. I was so concerned with wearing pink, having the makeup done for the videos, and wearing a tiara, I forgot my message:
Sharing the love of the outdoors (and the technical how to’s) so people could make happy memories.
We often get caught up in the “should” of writing a book – and dive into that heavy energy. It’s the exact same energy that says you “should” clean the kitchen every night and NEVER go to bed with a sink full of dishes. (Hint: that’s a big negative self-talk from external sources.)
Instead, slip into the wonderful feeling of WANTING to write your book. Of GETTING to write it. Of writing the message-driven book that is on your heart.
Let’s make these last weeks of 2023 MATTER. A great place to start is with The Book Idea Workbook. Spend one (powerful) afternoon with these exercises and walk away with clarity on:
- The book you REALLY want to write
- TONS of ideas – and honing in on the one that makes you the most excited
- Forward progress on what goes IN the book (you’ll want to pair this with Outline Oyster) to finalize your outline
- And more
- The Sixth Mental Monster (and what to do about it!) - February 27, 2024
- My Must-Know PROVEN Top 5 Tips for Marketing Your Book Like a Boss - February 20, 2024
- Does it feel like you’re being judged? - February 13, 2024