Discovering Normal
In the last weeks of my pregnancy, I wanted one thing: to find my new normal. It wasn’t about holding my son in my arms and finally seeing if he got my husband’s nose or my own… I couldn’t wait for life to be shaken into the new rhythms and patterns of a family of three, five if you count the dogs.
I’m a work from home entrepreneur – with a business I love. I’m not naïve. I knew that work – that life – would look very different. But I was hungry for the new patterns of work and naps and feedings. I’ve never had a corporate job so I wasn’t missing maternity leave. And the business just isn’t something I could put down, or even automate, and step back into weeks or months later. But I’ve worked from home for years – through all manner of chaos and upheaval – and I know two things are true:
- You’ve got to do whatever it takes to get the job done – nights, early mornings, working from uncomfortable situations like the laptop in a hot closet.
- No amount of chaos lasts forever.
And even in the throws of chaos, a rhythm or pattern will emerge.
Bringing forth my son would be no different. A new normal would be created. I also understood that this normal would be flexible and changeable as he grew from newborn into infant into toddler and as I grew as a wife, mom, and business woman.
I had no illusions of being super mom. My husband cooks most nights (happily and to amazing results), laundry is normally clean but rarely folded, and dishes are done when I run out of tea spoons. I figured Ben would step up for housework (he has) and that we’d all find an acceptable level of house-work-related-chaos together.
In the last weeks of the pregnancy, NORMAL was all I could talk about. Think about.
I’m sure it alarmed some people that I was more interested in the new routine than I was in the baby himself. That wasn’t at all the truth – but I can see how it seemed that way!
(And hotdogs. I spent a lot of time talking about the hotdogs I’d eat after the birth, when deli meats and the worry of a sausage-induced infection were no longer a concern!)
When I was graduating from the 
And that’s where the rubber really meets the road. Is your dream of writing and publishing your book really worth it? Or not?
When I was in elementary school, I had a teacher explain something I’d done to my parents with “Oh, Kim is such a perfectionist!” And all the adults nodded like this was the most logical thing in the world.
There’s a huge difference between taking professional pride and striving for excellence (or perfection!) than about being somebody who falls apart when things don’t go perfectly. I’m the first to admit that flexible isn’t really a word used to describe me – I’m actually not exactly go with the flow, laid back, or spontaneous.
“I trust a short pencil more than a long memory.”
As I’m settling into this “blah” feeling, it’s not about writing in general. In fact, at this very moment I’ve got at least three projects that spark excitement. But as for writing a meaningful article… crickets. Blahs. I’d go take a nap except that Ben is installing a fan in our room and my bed is covered in tools and pieces of the fan.