Why You SHOULDN’T Write a Book – Part 2

Last week I told you that you shouldn’t write a book – read that here.

Today, I want to share another reason why you should NOT write a book – and it goes hand-in-hand with the “because someone told your story should be a book.”

The other time you should NOT write a book is as a feather-in-your-cap moment. As in, you’ve got a coach, mentor, or advisor telling you that you’ve reached a certain level of fame and it’s time to write your book.

Oh that just makes me cringe!

Now I firmly believe that books are great to build your credibility and expertise. Being a published author is GREAT cred.

But only if you’re writing your book because YOU want to – because you’re ready to share your message.

Years ago, I edited a book for a client. And let me tell you friend… it was BORING. Like dry-as-dust boring. If I wasn’t being PAID to read it… I would have stopped.

When I asked her, gently, about WHY she wanted to write a book (because I was going to offer my writing coaching to help her out!) she told me:

I’m at the place in my business I just SHOULD write a book.

You figured that out correctly: she had no burning desire to write her book. It was just another thing to check off – like creating a sales page, opt-in gift, or setting up a social media profile.

No WONDER the book was so boring – there was ZERO heart in it.

After a few lackluster sales, the book slipped into Amazon oblivion.

Keep Reading!

Why You SHOULDN’T Write a Book – Part 1

“Should”

The word that killed a thousand dreams and launched a million failed projects.

Typically, when personal development folks start going on about “should” they talk about how you’re “shoulding all over yourself” i.e. you’re beating yourself up about the things you should do, should have done, should be doing, should not have done, should not be doing.

(Take a moment to ponder the grammar in that sentence and freak out about verb tense. I’ll wait.)

And while I’m definitely NOT a personal development guru or self-help expert, I mostly understand what they’re saying:

That SHOULD kills your momentum and dreams. Do it (or don’t) but stop shoulding yourself.

Greaaaaat.

Now let’s talk about how “should” functions in MY world.

It goes like this:

You’re having a great time, chatting with a new friend or acquaintance. You’re telling a story about something that has happened in your life – good or bad – and they’re hanging on every word.

Your verbal storytelling skills are spot-on. You’ve probably told this story so many times before, you know just how to deliver the emotional punch lines, where to speed up, where to slow down. How to change your voice inflection, how to gauge your listener – and make adjustments to your voice, story, and pace to KEEP them hooked.

And then…

And then…

And then…

You get it:

“That was GREAT! You should write a book.”

{Insert dramatic sigh and pregnant pause here.}

Keep Reading!

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Mid-Year Reset for Your Writing

It’s nearly July! Which means that 2022 is just about halfway over.

Is that a good thing – or a scary thing? Are you making progress toward your goals for your book this year… or not?

When you just “think” about what you’ve accomplished over the last six months, it’s really easy to fall into the “I didn’t do ANYTHING” trap. (Seriously, I do that too!)

You look back and only see where you “failed.”

(It’s rare, but sometimes you look back and overestimate what you’ve accomplished. MOST people only see a list of their setbacks, disappointments, and where they missed the mark,)

Except…

How do you KNOW what you’ve really accomplished?

By TRACKING it!

And then revaluating. Making a new plan.

All too often, goal setting is limited to January.

Um… that’s ridiculous! You can set a goal at ANY point in the year. There is no magic in January. Just like there’s no magic on Monday, or June 21, or in any other day.

Mid-year is a GREAT time to do a reset. Evaluate your goals. Create evidence of where you’re succeeding – and where you can use improvement. I spent my early morning doing just that: reviewing my goals, changing the ones that no longer fit, looking at what I’ve met (yay), where I’m getting closer, which I’ve forgotten (do I even still want that?), and setting NEW goals for myself.

This is where “The Writer’s Goal Setting Workbook: A Step-By-Step Process to Getting Your Writing Done” comes in.

I created this workbook JUST for you – to help you set goals around your writing. It will walk you through your wins, where you need improvement, and how to set doable goals for the upcoming months.

And no, you don’t ONLY need to start it in January!

It also offers 12 monthly tracking sheets so you can track your progress. No more “I THINK I’m doing it” or “I suck. I don’t do it.” – you’ll be able to see your progress add up.

Here’s some GREAT news:

Amazon has it on a WICKED-GOOD sale of over 60% off. But I don’t control Amazon so I have no clue how long that sale will last.

Get It Here

And let’s make the next six months something amazing!

Stories Transform Your Reader’s Heart – Examples of Writing Impactful Stories

Let me get on my soapbox…

Stories are how you connect to your reader. They’re how she knows, in her soul, in her bones, in her heart, that YOU, the author, Get Her. Understand her journey, her pain, her hopes for the future.

If you’re not using stories in you’re writing, you just can’t create that connection.

Let me illustrate:

Any author will tell you that there are moments where the writing gets tough and they want to give up. But they persevere because they can see the end goal: being seen as a credible expert; helping their reader to have a life-changing, life-affirming change; fulfilling a dream of writing a book.

It is in those moments of darkness, the author must dig deep into their wells of productivity, hard-work, and resilience to keep writing. Someday, they’ll look back with satisfaction for a book well-written.

O.
M.
G.

I WROTE that and it was boring. As soon as I wrote it, I wasn’t 100% sure what I said…

It didn’t sound like me. Those two paragraphs aren’t warm, inviting, caring. They don’t show, at all, my heart – and how I care about YOUR heart and the heart of the reader.

And I can almost guarantee that by now, in this moment of reading this article, you don’t exactly remember what I said, in all that pretentious glory.

(Right? You just scanned up to re-read those two paragraphs, didn’t you?!)

Now, try on the following story, first written back in June 2015

(Dude! That was two years BEFORE kids!)

Wild and rugged, Wet Beaver Creek, ArizonaTwo weeks ago Ben and I went on a 5-day backpacking trip. You know the drill: load everything into a 35 pound backpack, walk for miles into the back-country, camp, repeat the next day.

I realize that for some (a lot?) of you, that sounds like a mini version of hell. For me, it’s peace, tranquility, freedom. There’s that moment when my body says, “Ahhhh” to the weight of the pack. (By now, that’s usually the second I put it on!) And that second moment where my legs feel like they’re unattached, swinging loose from my hips, like walking is the natural state of being.

Not following me? Think of that moment where you’re doing something you love and suddenly every fiber in your being says, “Yes! I LOVE this! Yes!”

Now about this trip…

It was unlike anything we’d ever done before. It wasn’t a backpacking trip, but a canyoneering trip. I hate giving a rote definition but here’s a great explanation:

Canyoning (known as canyoneering in the U.S.) is traveling in canyons using a variety of techniques that may include other outdoor activities such as walking, scrambling, climbing, jumping, abseiling (rappelling), and swimming.

And this trip had everything except rope-work. Keep Reading!

Learning vs Doing: How to Get the Most Out of the Courses You Buy

There’s a big difference between watching a class on how to do a thing and DOING the thing. And for most learning, you can’t simply absorb the “lecture” and then be able to do the process.

For example, I bought a workshop on Instagram Reels from Marta Spirk. BUYING the workshop didn’t impart any knowledge.

I wasn’t able to attend the workshop live (story of my life) so I had to make time to watch the workshop replay. Because it was a replay, I was also able to pause it (over and over) to open popsicle wrappers, change a diaper, and queue up an episode of Blaze and the Monster Machines.

But just WATCHING the replay still didn’t give me the confidence to create a reel.

I had to watch the workshop, whip out my phone, open Instagram, and DO THE ACTIONS.

Which I did. While I’m far from good at creating reels, and I’ve yet to figure out how to create one that has anything to do with writing a book, I was able to shoot and edit a reel that was far more complicated than what I’d done before.

Total time: about three hours.

Don’t panic that it took me three hours to create a 15-second video!

That time includes watching the 90-minute workshop, asking questions in the Facebook group, and doing the steps to create the reel. But now that I’ve DONE IT, the next reels will be significantly faster. Minutes instead of hours.

Learning isn’t instant.

And you won’t be able to write a book from JUST watching my training videos.

You’ll understand the theory. You’ll THINK you “get it.” But without taking the actions in the lessons, writing, and doing the steps, you won’t ever actually WRITE a book.

Frustrating but true.

A few months ago, I took a class on how to scan in my watercolor artwork and use Photoshop to digitize it for art prints and products. It is so much more involved than just “scan and print!” Currently, I’m working on taking a set of four of my paintings and turning them into notecards – so I can send you mail.

Even though I’d taken this class to learn all the steps to color correct, crop, resize, etc. my art, I STILL tried to shortcut the system. Scan it into Photoshop, try a few automatic color corrections, load to Vistaprint to make notecards.

And it looked like CRAP. Nothing I wanted to spend my money on to print, let alone to send to YOU.

WHY this surprised me, I’ll never know. The instructor was VERY CLEAR that I couldn’t do what I’d just tried.

I know why I’m trying to shortcut it. It’s a four-hour long class. Yes, I’ve watched it – but I didn’t take notes, let alone TRY any of the steps she was giving.

Is the time I spent watching the class wasted?

Only if I don’t watch it again!

  1. Watching without doing gave me the language of this new, technical skill.
  2. Watching without doing gave me the foundation of the process.

Next I’ll need to watch and take notes. (So I don’t have to watch it over and over when I want to DO it.)

And while I’m watching and taking notes, I’ll have my computer in front of me to ALSO follow along.

Keep Reading!

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The Intersection of Time and Fear

I’ve had dozens of people email me over the past week – telling me what their biggest challenge is around writing their book.

It boils down to pretty much two things:

  1. How can I find more time to write?
  2. Am I doing this writing… right?

When those two challenges show up in combination… it’s a recipe for inaction (and then getting MAD at yourself for not writing!)

My darling author, let’s look at this okay?

Time

Imagine me holding your hand and saying this very gently:

We make time for the things that matter.

And if you look at your life, you’ll find it’s true. You’ll also find that it’s EASIER to make time for other people – less so for yourself. Which is why you’re probably also struggling to find time to exercise (me!), go to bed at a decent hour, pursue your hobbies, and yes, write.

The things that seem “easy” are caring for other people – those kids HAVE to eat, they HAVE to have clean clothes (even if they aren’t folded), and the dog HAS to be fed. If you’ve got clients or a job, you rarely, if ever, drop THOSE balls – they are cared for.

Now, add in the fact that you are TIRED. It’s so easy to watch TV, scroll social media, even disappear into a book. And that’s okay! You’ve GOT to have time to switch off your brain and rest.

And…

We make time for the things that matter.

We make time for things that matter. Your book, your message... MATTERS. Click To Tweet

Writing your book DOES matter. And you WANT to make time to write. But… here’s where time intersects with fear. Because WHY spend your time on something that, while enjoyable and you WANT to do, you’re riddled with self-doubts about if your message does in fact, matter; will anybody READ the book, and are you writing “correctly” so people will want to read it later.

Does my writing MATTER?

We WANT to make an impact in the world. We WANT to make a difference, to help people. We also want to be liked, respected, and appreciated.

Writing is a solo activity. And it’s almost impossible to figure out if you’re doing it “right” on your own. You either think all your writing is BRILLIANT and wonderful… or your convinced it’s all crap and you should never write again.

There’s no middle ground.

Keep Reading!

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Don’t Use Your “Signature Talk” to Write Your Book (It’s a bad idea – here’s why!)

For YEARS now, it’s been floating around the coaching industry that the best way to write your book is to simply take your “signature talk” and put it in your book. Some “book writing companies” even go as far as saying they’ll record you giving your talk, transcribe it, clean it up, and that’s your book.

I’m calling false.

This is a TERRIBLE idea!

Why?

Because your talk, sometimes called a signature talk, your webinar, preview call, or a speak to sell talk, serves a very different purpose than a book.

These talks are designed to position you as an expert, give some WHY the person should do what you say, tease the HOW you get results, and then invite them to buy from you.

Want to know what else does that?

A sales page.

Your book is NOT a long-form sales letter!

Your book is NOT a long-form sales letter. Don't write it that way! Do THIS instead. Click To Tweet

Your book SHOULD be used to encourage people to work with you more closely – if that’s your thing. (For many of my authors, they don’t HAVE coaching program, products, or “stuff” for a reader to buy.)

Keep Reading!

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