Whose Advice Are You “Buying”?
I see it all.the.time. (especially in my launch clients). They hire me for my knowledge, my expertise, and my brilliance – and invest in themselves – and then …
“Well my (Virtual Assistant, Branding Coach, Mentor, Best-Friend, Husband, Mastermind) says …”
And then I’m left trying to bring all these conflicting pieces of advice into a single entity.
The client is confused. I’m frustrated. And the end result …
A camel is a horse designed by committee!
I totally get where you’re coming from. I really do. You want to create the best platform for your message AND you want to reach the most people AND you want to make money while doing it. And you’ve watched other people create the kind of results that you want to have.
It’s only natural to try to compile all the data and then make a plan.
The problem is that all too often we end up with analysis paralysis.
This shows up two ways:
1. Endlessly learning, researching, and attending webinars.
If one mentor is good, then three is better, right?
Not always. I think there is a time and a place to be learning as much as you can about a subject – whether that is how to launch a book or how to write a book. There are a thousand and one resources out there for you to take advantage of, many of them free!
And there’s always the newest, latest, next best tool, resource, or tip just waiting for you to find it, right?
2. Jumping from one person’s advice to another.
Sometimes you just want somebody to cut though the clutter and say “do this” – and then you do it. But it’s inevitable that when somebody tells you “do this” it contracts some other piece of knowledge, learning, or advice.
So you reach out to the next trusted friend, vendor, or mentor and get … more conflicting advice!
Friend, this is me too. Right now, I’m trying to get all the elements I need in place to sponsor a big event (already invested in it!) and capitalize on the leads that come from it AND plan my next live event that is happening September 27-29. These two events need to come together and help me build so that I can get MY message out there and help my authors share THEIR message.
I know that end result …
And just like you, I’ve been wandering around second-guessing everything while trying to get there.
Here are five questions for you to ask yourself as you’re taking your next step.
1. Does this person know my needs, my bigger goal, and my message?
I’ve been getting advice from three different mentors. I realized that while they all have my best interests at heart, ONE of them isn’t up-to-speed on my current marketing, message, and time overhead. No wonder her advice felt old and outdated for my current reality!
If the person you’re asking for advice doesn’t ask LOTS of questions (maybe even including some that make you think or make you question your current ideas) then they’re not right for you! That person ALSO needs to listen closely and ask clarifying questions too!
2. Has this person done what I’ve done?
Getting advice on writing a book? How many books has your advisor written?
Launching a product or service? How often has your mentor launched and how many people has she helped to do the same?
I realized that one person I was asking for advice hasn’t done the style of live event I’m doing. (She HAS put on events and workshops!) So that advice is kind of apples to oranges.
It’s okay to ask your advisor for HER own results and/or the results she’s created for her clients.
3. Does it feel good?
With ANY mentor, coach, friend, or resource – it’s got to feel like it’s in alignment. When I was putting on my first 3-day event in 2016, a trusted mentor of mine was really pushing me to do a series of 1-day events. (Or even half-day events.) All the logic was there. But the idea of it not only didn’t light me up, it made me sad and a bit sick to my stomach.
So I go with what feels like a big YES! where I can’t wait to get started.
While feelings aren’t the be-all, end-all if your advisor isn’t helping you find something that IS yummy to you then they’re too concerned with their own agenda and not concerned enough about YOUR needs.
4. Is this advice aligned with what I really desire?
This ties into #3. If I took this advice, would I actually be moving closer to my dreams and desires? Or is this advice off on a tangent? (Or worse, completely driving me in the wrong direction?)
I’ll admit that not every single action can feel good in every single moment. So #4 is really about asking myself if this advice, if I followed it, would get me another step toward my dream. If it’s not creating my ideal result, then I don’t follow it!
Remember, that sometimes advice IS aligned with your bigger vision – but your mentor is seeing an even bigger dream for you than you can see for yourself. It’s okay to let some things sink in for a while before accepting or dismissing them.
5. Whose money is on the line?
This is a big one to remember: it’s MY credit card on the line! (Or my ability to make money!) Which means, no how well intentioned the mentor, at the end of the day it’s al about me. My ability to implement. My ability to make money or get a return on my investment.
Your mentor doesn’t have skin in the game. It’s not her credit card on the line for your room. It’s not her bills that need to get paid with your launch. It’s not her name on your book cover.
The right mentor will ACT like it IS her money on the line though! She’ll help you remember to follow-up, she’ll encourage you to keep going and to stay innovative. She’ll celebrate successes and help you recover from setbacks.
So let me ask you:
Whose advice are you buying?
Because at the end of the day, it’s all about YOUR message, YOUR business, YOUR bank account, and YOUR ability to implement.
You want somebody to be in your corner and help you see it through!
If you want to have a chat with me about strategic marketing for your next book, event, or course then click here.
- When the “Template” Doesn’t Work to Write Your Book - May 29, 2023
- The Procrastinator’s Guide to Writing Your Book - May 23, 2023
- Running Out of Time to Write? You’ll Have More Time After THIS - April 25, 2023